ON THE TABLE
Wednesday, June 24, 2009 at 08:49AM June 24, 2009
Akio Toyoda. Publisher's Note: The good news? You're the grandson of the founder of Toyota. The bad news? You're taking over a company that went from having a $36 billion war chest a little over a year ago to one reporting a $4 billion loss last fiscal year, the company's first reported loss since 1950. And your company is expected to lose a little less than $6 billion in this fiscal year too. Previous (now disgraced) management built too many factories in what turned out to be an overly aggressive play for the auto industry lead, only to see the global financial collapse crush the company's liquidity. Sales are down - the vaunted Camry and Corolla are noticeably stale and reeling in the marketplace here - and other car companies have essentially caught up to Toyota in quality. The Toyota Way isn't looking so special now, to put it mildly. Things are looking bleak, Akio, but since you earned an MBA from Babson College in Massachusetts and you're fluent in English, you'll understand it when we say that you've inherited a heaping, steaming bowl of Not Good. Welcome to the jungle, Akio, and welcome to your turn in the AE barrel. - PMD
Nissan, Ford. The two manufacturers get "green" loans - $5.9 billion to Ford, $1.6 billion to Nissan - from the U.S. Department of Energy to help convert their plants in order to build more fuel-efficient cars. Ford is going to distribute the money to several of its facilities and advanced development programs, while Nissan is going to spend the money at its Smyrna, Tenn., facility for its electric vehicle program. Let's hope after all this that someone actually wants to buy these green machines.
U.S. Department of Energy. From the "Smoke and Mirrors" File comes word that the U.S. Department of Energy is also giving Tesla Motors $465 million, so that it can become a real car company instead of a boondoggle that makes outrageously overpriced battery-eating kit cars. At least that's the idea anyway. But then again if we have to listen to Elon Musk's relentlessly tedious "I'm a frickin' genius" thought balloons while he continues to blow smoke rings up the asses of the dupes in the media, we all lose. Memo to the U.S. Department of Energy: Recall that money now, you bozos.
Chrysler. Our AE Ominous Headline of the Week (yes, a brand-spanking-new AE award) goes to this gem from this week's Automotive News, which ran on Page 1: "Chrysler mulls rwd mid-sized replacement." Uh, you guys are mulling a mid-sized replacement at this point? So like we're talking 2014-1/2 as a 2015 model at the earliest? That's rich. Fiat North America is getting closer to reality by the minute, ain't it boys?
Jeff Goodby. The advertising guru did a guest column in AdAge where he insists that the ad biz needs to get back to being about making "famous" ads again - the kind people recognize and remember - instead of creating esoterica designed to win awards or please self-indulgent egos. Here's an excerpt: "We've created a system that rewards work that is increasingly unknown to anyone outside the business. We have become connoisseurs of esoterica. And in the process, we're becoming more about us, and less about changing the world. We are becoming irrelevant award-chasers." Truer words were never spoken, Jeff. And that's our AE Quote of the Week.
See another live episode of "Autoline After Hours" hosted by Autoline Detroit's John McElroy, with Peter De Lorenzo and auto industry PR veteran Jason Vines this Thursday evening, June 25, at 7:00PM EDT at www.autolinedetroit.tv. By the way, if you'd like to subscribe to the Autoline After Hours podcasts, click on the following links:
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