THE AUTOEXTREMIST

December 8, 2010

Why the Super Bowl needs to be a car commercial-free zone.

By Peter M. De Lorenzo

(Posted 12/6, 6:30 p.m.) Detroit. It has been said that if there weren’t rampant, runaway egos involved then it wouldn’t be advertising. And as an ad industry veteran I can assure you this is true on both sides of the ball, with ad agency-types and clients vying for egomaniacal honors on any given project at any given moment in time, especially if things are going less than swimmingly well. Conversely, when things are going well, creating outstanding advertising can be a most addictive and satisfying endeavor, one that keeps prodigiously talented people fired-up and coming back for more.

After all, there are few businesses around that place as much critical emphasis on brandishing creativity and flaunting what you got, both literally and figuratively. Advertising is right up there with making movies and creating music, and it’s every bit as intense.

And when you inject automobiles into the mix, you can multiply all of the above by a thousand.

Creating effective automotive advertising that actually moves the metal is one of the greatest challenges creative people can engage in. But creating automotive advertising that is both memorable and emotionally compelling is that much more difficult. Not impossible, mind you, but damn hard.

Advertising automobiles is a high-octane high-wire act fueled by multi-million dollar advertising budgets, with the success of billion-dollar product programs at stake and careers on the line. It’s not for the faint of heart or the meekly intended, so yeah, you better bet that ego plays a big part in all of it.

And for the players involved in the ad biz it’s no secret that the National Football League’s Super Bowl is also the Super Bowl of advertising. This nation’s grandest sporting stage also happens to be the one place where advertisers and their ad agencies can’t contain themselves, openly salivating at the prospect of making at least a fleeting impression on all of those eyeballs glued to flat-screen TVs across the country, even though it costs $3 million - or thereabouts - a pop.

And automotive advertisers are no different, especially for the upcoming Super Bowl XLV, which will originate from Arlington, Texas, in the new Cowboys Stadium, next February 6. After two years of wandering around lost in the desert – or rolling around in the bankruptcy dungeon as the case may be – and while still recovering from the worst recession to hit the auto biz in decades, automobile companies are chomping at the bit to get back on the big game, and in a big way too.

As AdAge reported this week, eight automobile manufacturers – count ‘em, eight – have lined up to buy advertising time on the Super Bowl. That means eight earnest and well-intentioned manufacturers – Audi, BMW, Chevrolet, Chrysler, Hyundai, Kia, Mercedes-Benz and Volkswagen in this case – along with their respective ad agencies – actually believe in total seriousness and with absolute certainty that they can muster the creative energy that not only will send their fellow automotive advertisers cowering into the corner, but that they will serve up spots that the Super Bowl viewing audience will actually care about.

And despite all of that optimism I’m here to tell you that there’s not a chance of it happening either. Yeah, sure, one or two of these manufacturers’ ad agencies will come up with a spot that may gain some instant –albeit brief – semi-notoriety, but it won’t move the needle for these car companies, at least not to the degree that they think it will, or that they’ll tell the media that it does.

And it’s not that people won’t be watching either, because they will; it’s because what sells on the Super Bowl usually falls into two distinct categories: emotionally involving/compelling/powerful, or flat-out whacked-out humor. First of all car companies take themselves far too seriously to go toe-to-toe with the kind of humor that’s found on the Super Bowl, and when it comes to doing emotionally compelling stuff they’re usually successful so infrequently it doesn’t even register.

After all, when you start bandying about the figure of $3 million in media buy costs for one spot on the big game, and as much as $1 million+ in production costs on top of that, automotive marketers get very, very nervous. And when ad marketers get nervous they tend to get ponderous, conservative, sober and boring. The result? They end up producing a spot for the Super Bowl broadcast that’s largely forgettable.

And for what, exactly?

Is it for pure ego reasons? Or is it because they think they should be on there to prove their standing in corporate America? Or is it because they think they need to be there because one of their toughest competitors will be there?

How does all of the above sound?

But none of those reasons – I repeat none of those reasons – is reason enough for these car companies to be involved. Because if the creative work isn’t good enough, or memorable enough, or “1984” Apple computer spot all-time great enough, then it’s not worth it. And given the history of car advertising on the Super Bowl, the odds are definitely stacked against these manufacturers from making that kind of an impact.

If it were up to me I’d rule the Super Bowl to be a car commercial-free zone in the interest of keeping these automotive marketers from throwing away good money after bad and making the kind of mistakes that yield – in my book – one of two of the most dreaded reactions to advertising that can be achieved:

1. Total Indifference, as in, “Was there a car spot on the game?”

Or, 2. The “Wince Factor,” as in, “That spot was too horrific for words.”

And that’s the High-Octane Truth for this week.

See another live episode of "Autoline After Hours" with hosts John McElroy, from Autoline Detroit, and Peter De Lorenzo, The Autoextremist, and guests this Thursday evening, at 7:00PM EDT at www.autolinedetroit.tv.

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